Tea

This past week my doctor informed me that I should stop drinking caffeine. 

And then we both laughed and laughed...no, we didn't.  He was serious.

He said this, I feel obliged to point out, while a large take-out cup of some hot beverage was On. His. Desk.

There is almost no chance of this happening but it is minorly possible that maybe I could manage it.  I mostly drink tea, and not coffee, and I don't really like herbal tea, is one of the main problems with this plan.  I have been known to refer to the taste of many herbal teas as being like "wet dust".  And I stick by that.  I do like some herbal teas, but usually those end up being very expensive ones and even then I rarely think of them when the part of my brain that lights up with 'Make a Cuppa' clicks on.

Some people are emotional eaters, and I am an emotional tea drinker.  My husband said recently "it isn't so much that you like to drink tea as you like to MAKE tea."  And actually that might be more accurate because a good 60% of my tea just gets poured, cold, down the drain.  I was very proud of myself a few years ago when, after trying for quite a long time, I managed to cut sugar out of my tea routine.  Now I just drink it with milk.  And to be fair I drink it with a LOT of milk, but I do still drink it three or four times a day.  It is the thing I do in the morning - put on the kettle for tea.  It is the first thing I think of when stressed.  I should make a cup of tea.  Come over for a cup of tea.  Oh, hello there, do you want to stay for tea?  I'm sorry, you seem really upset, come in and I'll make tea.  I wish we could sit and have some tea together because I miss you.  I'll call you in a second, let me just make a cup of tea.  Would you put the kettle on for me, dear?  

I make the tea, and then there is perhaps a 30% chance I will forget about the steeping tea.  If I do remember, then I will add a lot of milk, and then I will sit somewhere with it and there is again a good 30% chance I will never finish it or will possibly not even start it, depending on how absent-minded I am.

But I make the tea.  I need to make the tea.  You don't understand, doctor, without the tea...what will I DO??  Don't, Do Not, tell me with your mug of something hot that I will bet good money is not, like, boiling water with a virtuous floating lemon slice, that you don't have something you do when you're stressed?  It's not like I spend a lot of money emotionally shopping or something.  I just...make cups of tea.  And leave them around the house, half consumed, because the sound of my beloved sighing is like unto music to my ears.

I thought about this today as I went to the cafe in town.  It's not a big town, but we have recently had a small, trendy, urban little cafe pop up and we're all feeling very ritzy about it.  And usually I order the same thing every time I go, and it is this:  A Twinings Earl Grey Tea In The Big Tiffany Blue Mug.  They know what mug I like.  They leave a lot of room for milk.  Twinings is my favourite Earl Grey.  The little yellow bags just...make me so happy inside.  But of course, who the heck is going to order an herbal tea in The Big Tiffany Blue Mug??  The Big Tiffany Blue Mug, darn it, was made for Twinings Earl Grey Tea.  Full stop.  I will not commit the sacrilege of sullying it with the likes of CHAMOMILE.  Which, seriously, who decided on that flower?  Let's just steep grass clippings and be done with it.

Anyway, I couldn't order it.  So I asked for something cold, and this is how I ended up with a chilled vanilla latte and when she asked if I wanted one or two shots of espresso I said with virtue, but also realizing fully that this WHOLE THING WAS MUCH WORSE THAN TEA, that I would just take the one shot, thanks.  And then I sat outside and drank it all on the patio and twitched.